My Very Own Bon Appétit!

Sometimes I feel like a fish out of water.

I’m not sure if it is my sun bleached blonde hair, my inability to pronounce every French word correctly, the fact that I smile at almost everyone I see, or because sometimes I dress more like a Canadian than a European…whatever the reason, it’s enough to let me and everyone else know that I am far away from home. It’s not that I don’t mind standing out a little, but in France I feel like it might be better if I just blend in. I’m not walking down the streets in Cardston or in Rexburg where a lot of people know your name and/or belong to the same church as you. Here, I am just stared down by people probably curious to know my story, just as I am theirs.

Today, as I walked through the rain to the university I just kept feeling so many things. Wetness, for one, because I don’t have my trusty English umbrella with me! And I wondered why I was here in France. Not just to learn French…not just because it has been something I’ve wanted since I was young…not just to have a new adventure… but really why. I came up with some interesting things, some of which have a lot to do with being humbled. Ever had any of those experiences?

In the town center today I sat down on the fountain steps and had just taken a huge bite of my sandwich when a guy plopped down next to me, smiling way too big and said excitedly, “bon appetite!!!” As soon as I heard those words I thought, “great…here we go again.” I have to admit, I wasn’t really interested in practicing my French with this golden toothed, fluffed up chav, so I just simply said in French that I only spoke English, hoping that would destroy all hopes of a future conversation. It was just my luck though, because this over confident ladies man called over a friend that was observing the scene and he immediately was designated to be the translator. Haha. My “bon appetite friend” repeatedly told me me I was really beautiful and then asked me to have a drink with him in French, which I understood fine, but pretended not too until the translator had to come over…and I just said non merci. He practically jumped in my lap at my answer and said POURQUOI?! Ha…I simply pointed to the ring I wear on my left hand and said fiancé! And he was like “…oooooh!” Then, I just made up a bunch of stuff about having a fiancé and it seemed to be enough for him. I watched them walk away, stop, look around and find the new prey. So funny…and creepy.

The university students of Nantes do a lot of initiations here for new students. It’s really interesting to see and also makes me really happy that I don’t have to be a part of it all. Today, after my Bon Appetite friend left, the crowd started to grow until I found myself surrounded with young people running circles around me and the fountain dressed up as everything you can imagine from Fiona off of the film ‘Shrek’, to a lifeguard and I think what could be classified as a pillow. ha. The older students were yelling commands at them and it was quite ridiculous watching them just run around doing whatever they were told. I felt really trapped and didn’t have much of a choice to sit there and watch it all happen for fear of getting trampled by the costumed students. I couldn’t help but think how ridiculous they all looked and must have felt doing that. They were in a situation where they had to jump through hoops in order to be accepted. It made me think of how lucky we are in the gospel to have the Savior love us unconditionally, no matter if we are a new member of the church, or if our families have a heritage of membership… He accepts, loves, and invites us all the same. Satan, on the other hand works the other way around. He makes you think He loves you…but we really have to earn his love by jumping through hoops. The only time we feel Him is when he is telling us to do really ridiculous things, and we can appear to be someone different than we are. It’s the only way he accepts us…by us jumping through hoops at our own expense, and then when its done…He’s gone. Abandoned us without a second thought.

There is still so much for me to learn here…in so many ways. I hope that when I come home, people won’t be so focused on how much French I learned, but more on how Hilary has changed for the better.